10.10.01 - 6:15 am
i feel so alone right now.. because it's plain to see i've lost all battles. all my problems and fears are in my mind, and mine only. i don't want to be helped, i just want to be loved. it's funny when you truly lose at having an intimate standing with someone, you immediatly yearn for it. (it's the losing part that takes a long time, not the yearning) maybe if i were rich, people'd love me? hehe seems to be my only problem.. money... i wish life wasn't so shallow. damn the world for not catering to a hopeless romantic.
I opened AND ate ,mind you, a chinese fortune cookie again today.. cause i have a billion sitting in my kitchen. this one came with two fortunes.. how lucky.. they were, "strong and bitter words indicate a weak cause" and "you will inherit a large sum of money" hence the reason i brought up money.. fuck it, i'm going back to bed. goodnight.
